Dare to live without limits Week of 7/15/19

Bryan Golden

Do you feel like you are moving backwards?

Making progress and moving forward is a great feeling. But what should you do if you feel like you are moving backwards? It’s very frustrating to feel as if you are losing ground. No one wants to drift away from their objective.
Moving backwards doesn’t happen on its own. Determining if you are engaging in any backwards causing behavior is enlightening. You won’t be able to change direction until you take corrective action.
Remaining in your comfort zone prevents forward progress. A ship which won’t leave the safety of the dock will never go anywhere. You must leave your comfort zone in order to move toward your objective. Risk taking is essential for goal attainment.
Strengthen your risk-taking ability by taking small steps outside of your comfort zone. Every success helps you overcome the fear of failure, which is a major factor in moving backwards. Fear of failure is a mindset which limits your accomplishments.
Self-doubt pulls you backward. You mind never lets you accomplish something you don’t believe you are capable of. When you think you can’t, you are right. Another form of self-doubt is feeling you don’t deserve success. This attitude may lead to self-sabotage of your goals by intentionally making bad decisions.
Self-doubt is mitigated through positive self-talk. Instead of telling yourself all the things you can’t or won’t do, tell yourself everything you can and will do. Concentrate on all of your positive qualities and abilities. You have more going for you than you realize.
Negative people pull you backwards with their criticisms. Negative people drag you down with their “you can’t do it,” and “it won’t work” attitudes. They are experts at finding reasons why you won’t succeed. Ignore these naysayers. Paying attention to them is toxic.
Instead, look to successful people for inspiration. Study those individuals who are already where you want to be. You’ll save a lot of time by learning how they solve problems and overcome obstacles.
Expecting success to be quick and easy leads to backsliding disappointment. Anything worthwhile requires effort. Often, several attempts are needed before achieving success. How much time it actually takes to reach your goal is independent of how long you think it will take.
There’s no way to predict how much effort will be required, or how long it will take. Maintain your forward momentum by continuously taking one step after another. Get back up whenever you stumble and fall.
Pursuing goals designed to please others is a path to unhappiness. Attempting to achieve externally imposed goals is frustrating. You feel as if you are moving backwards because you are not doing what you want. Formulate goals which are important to you.
Don’t pay attention to what other people say, think, or do. You don’t need anyone’s approval to follow your own path. Pursue dreams which are meaningful to you. You don’t have to justify why you want what you want.
Lamenting the past pushes you backward. Dwelling on what you could have, or should have done focuses your attention behind you. In this mode, forward progress is impossible because you are stuck in the past.
Your past teaches you what worked and what didn’t. Eliminate unsuccessful strategies while repeating behavior which generates desirable results. Don’t repeat the same mistakes over and over.
Whenever you feel as if you are moving backwards look for the reasons why. Understanding why it is happening enables you to take corrective action. Moving backwards does not have to be a permanent change in direction. Your forward momentum will resume as soon as you get realigned with your objective.

NOW AVAILABLE: "Dare to Live Without Limits," the book. Visit www.BryanGolden.com or your bookstore. Bryan is a management consultant, motivational speaker, author, and adjunct professor. E-mail Bryan at bryan@columnist.com or write him c/o this paper.  2019 Bryan Golden


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