Dare to live without limits Week of 1/6/20

By: 
Bryan Golden

More than we like, our lives are subject to change
As a consumer, you have grown used to seeing “subject to change” in the fine print of various advertisements and promotions. This qualifier also applies to your life. Change happens regardless of what you do. You change, circumstances change, and situations change.
Change is challenging because there is a tendency to be averse to change. Change forces you out of your comfort zone and into the unknown. Change is fraught with uncertainty. Unexpected change causes stress and anxiety. Typically, change is unwelcome and resisted.
Understating how you feel in response to change, and why, enables you to get in touch with your emotions. Identifying your emotions provides insight into which strategies you would be most comfortable with. Your objective is to engage in behavior which makes you feel better, not worse.
Don’t take out your frustrations over change by snapping at others. It doesn’t help you, and it pushes people away. Being nice, kind and considerate will help you feel better. Helping others is a meaningful way to take your attention off your own predicament.
A proactive approach to change prevents you from feeling like a victim. Deciding what step to take next provides some control over your direction. Victims are passive, feeling sorry for their predicament, and wallowing in their misery. They are also resentful for their plight and blame other people or circumstances.
When facing change, recognize what you can and can’t control. Since any effort devoted to issues beyond your control is wasted, concentrate your energy on circumstances you can influence. This is one of the most effective strategies for dealing with change.
Keep things in perspective. Let go of anything which is irrelevant and doesn’t matter. When stressed, you tend to fixate on superfluous stuff which is totally insignificant. Instead, your focus should be on all important aspects of your situation which have a significant bearing on where you are headed.
Keep an open mind. You never know where a good idea may originate, or what might inspire a useful strategy. An open mind incorporates a can-do mindset which includes everything positive you can and will do to improve your situation. Part of this process is purging all excuses justifying why you can’t or won’t be able to accomplish a specific objective.
Don’t complain, instead find solutions. Complaining empowers problems, causing them to become entrenched. Looking for an appropriate, positive solution moves you toward what your next step should be. Each step forward, no matter how small, helps in effectively dealing with change.
A sense of humor is a wonderful stress reducer, which helps handle change. Humor helps you maintain a healthy perspective. It improves your mood, which empowers you to find solutions more readily. Additionally, a sense of humor connects you with other positive people.
Connecting with other positive, supportive people is another effective coping mechanism. It creates a opportunity for brainstorming to find meaningful strategies. The value of a strong support network is helping you discover solutions. Conversely, looking for people to complain to accomplishes nothing positive.
Every situation is a learning opportunity. There is always more to learn about yourself, about others and about solving problems. Handling adversity makes you stronger, and helps you become a more effective problem solver.
Take care of yourself physically and mentally. You can’t help yourself if you let yourself go. Proper diet, rest and exercise are all vital to your physical well-being. A positive outlook is a foundation for your emotional well-being.
Since change is part of life, it’s in your best interest to become adept at dealing with it. Utilizing the suggestions above will make a positive difference.

NOW AVAILABLE: "Dare to Live Without Limits," the book. Visit www.BryanGolden.com or your bookstore. Bryan is a management consultant, motivational speaker, author, and adjunct professor. E-mail Bryan at bryan@columnist.com or write him c/o this paper.  2019 Bryan Golden

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