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The Clutter Olympics: Moving the past to the recycle bin
Written by John Szozda   
Thursday, 06 May 2010 15:45

I recently perused my column files for the annual Press Clutter Olympics and sent these dog-eared, yellowed clippings to the recycle bin.
A 1988 editorial from USA Today titled “Keep up the fight in the war on drugs.” The paper argued legalizing drugs would increase abuse because they would be cheaper and, while we’d save $8 billion annually on law enforcement costs, we’d pay $60 billion in lost productivity, medical costs and drug-related crime caused by junkies who can’t afford the legal price or who go ballistic on hallucinogens like PCP.

Today, California and Colorado are experimenting with decriminalizing marijuana, which could be the first step in legalizing, regulating and taxing it to help pay for government services. Legalization won’t be a panacea, however. Home growers will undercut corporate growers in price, thieves will break into homes to steal the crop and many tokers will avoid paying the tax by buying on the black market. Given all that, the experiment is welcome as it gives states more solid information on which to base modern drug policy.

One more useless survey on men and housework
Written by John Szozda   
Thursday, 29 April 2010 16:05

The headline on Google read, “More housework means more sex for busy couples.”

I clicked on and dove in, but three minutes later I left unsatisfied.

Same old stuff.

One more useless survey on housework.

This one appeared in the February issue of the Journal of Family Issues.

Its conclusion?

Women spend twice as much time on housework as men do—41.8 hours per week versus 23.4.

Bull. No woman I know spends six hours a day cleaning house, unless she’s obsessive-compulsive. No man I know cleans 3.3 hours unless he’s polishing the remote.

Let’s scrape the crud off this nonsense. The survey conducted by Montclair State University in New Jersey, interviewed 6,877 couples. It defined housework as hours spent in nine tasks: cleaning, cooking, washing dishes, laundry, driving family members to activities, shopping, yard work, car maintenance and paying bills.

Test your memory loss with this Press trivia test
Written by John Szozda   
Thursday, 22 April 2010 13:52

Do you have symptoms of short-term memory loss or ADD?

If you’re a regular reader of The Press, take this test to determine how serious your condition is.

If you score:
13—16   Congrats. You have 4-gigs RAM;
9—12    Stress may have shrunk your hippocampus
5—8     Eat blueberries, drink pomegranate juice
0—4     Brace for the electrodes. You’re toast.

1) This football team celebrated its 70th anniversary last year and it may be its last.
 a) The Jack Frost Sugars
 b) East Side Raiders

2) This former Toledo Goaldigger and member of Team USA which won hockey gold in Lake Placid in 1990 was in town earlier this year to sign autographs at a Toledo Walleye game.
 a) Ted Garvin
 b) Mike Eruzione

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