Life is easy when all is on track and working as expected. The challenge is when you encounter bumps in the road, complete detours, or get stuck. When facing difficulties, there are many forces attempting to erode your attitude.
Throwing your arms up in despair is an automatic response that takes no effort. You may be tempted to blame other people or circumstances for your predicament. This is known as having a victim mentality. Perhaps you even consider giving up as an option.
Regardless of what challenges you are facing, you are the answer. Look within yourself for solutions. You already possess whatever is needed to deal with your situation. Becoming frustrated, bitter, angry, or resentful works against you. Things are what they are. The critical decision you must make is determining your next step.
Unfortunately, we are conditioned to place blame for problems or look to others to fix our problems. Following this path causes you to become mired in your problems. If this is your normal reaction to obstacles, you need to retrain yourself to become self-reliant.
The first step in this process is recognizing there is a solution for every problem. Regardless of what you are facing, other people have dealt with the same issue successfully. However, there are also many examples of those who have been unsuccessful.
Your objective is to look only at successful people for inspiration. This takes determination on your part as you will be offered reasons from many others as to why you will fail. These naysayers provide a litany of examples showing others who have failed. Looking to negative people for advice assures your failure as well.
You won't find a solution if you don't believe one exists. In order to discover a solution, you must believe one does exist and that you will be able to find it. Discovering a solution is not dependent on education, money, or intelligence. It is based on a positive attitude and determination.
Next, recognize that you do have the ability to find the solution. For guidance, only look to those who have successfully solved similar problems. Ignore advice from people who have been unsuccessful. Although they may be well meaning, they can't provide any useful suggestions.
There are usually many courses of action available for overcoming an obstacle. How do you know which is the best one for you? By knowing yourself. Since you are the answer, you have to know who you are.
To accomplish this, you need to answer some questions. What are your goals? What are you trying to accomplish? What do you like? What do you dislike? What are your strengths? What are your weaknesses?
Once you have answered these questions, list all possible resolutions for your situation. Don't evaluate them, just write them down. Next, rank them in order of preference. Any solution is possible with commitment and determination.
Once you have determined the appropriate solution, you have your answer. Now you are ready to take action. Without action, nothing happens. You may know what to do, but until you do it, nothing changes.
In order to implement your solution, you may need additional knowledge, expertise, or experience. You can either acquire it yourself or get it from someone else who has what you need.
Whatever challenges you face, always remember that you are the answer. Your attitude should always be "I can" and "I will." Take control of your life and choose the path that fits you best.
NOW AVAILABLE: "Dare to Live Without Limits," the book. Visit www.BryanGolden.com or your bookstore. Bryan is a management consultant, motivational speaker, author, and adjunct professor. E-mail Bryan at
or write him c/o this paper. 2013 Bryan Golden