Your outlook determines your mood as well as what you attract. Two people can face the exact same circumstances and yet one may be happy while the other is consistently upset. Their outlook is what makes the difference.
You can test your outlook by getting in touch with your emotional state. How do you feel most of the time? Do you tend to be happy and upbeat or are you usually stressed and frustrated? Do you find solutions for the problems you encounter or do you find problems everywhere you look?
Your outlook affects your perception which in turn defines your reality. If you want to improve how you feel and how you deal with your life, you have to conduct an honest self-assessment and then make any necessary adjustments.
Making excuses for your situation inhibits you from taking corrective action. Regardless of what has happened to you or why, it’s your response that determines your future. Learn from the past and then determine where you want to go from where you are now. You can’t control other people but you do have total control over your outlook.
Thinking like a victim works against you as well. People with a victim mentality believe they have no control over their life. They are convinced that all they can do is wait for circumstances to change. This leads to constant stress, frustration, and disappointment.
The first adjustment to make to your outlook is the recognition of the power you have over your life’s direction. This step precedes any positive changes. Eliminate all excuses. End the victim mentality. Look in the mirror to see who is in control.
Adjusting your outlook doesn’t involve changing anyone else’s. Trying to control or change another person is a futile endeavor as well as a source of great stress. All you have control over is your own outlook. There will always be people you don’t agree with, who treat you poorly, and who are rude and inconsiderate. Regardless of their behavior, you determine your outlook.
You don’t want to give others the power to control your emotions. Getting physically or emotionally sick over other people’s behavior is a waste. They won’t change and you will suffer.
Circumstances fall into two basic categories: those situations you can influence and those you have no control over. Accurately determining which category you are dealing with is important. You want to take the appropriate action for situations you can influence and let go of those you have no control over.
Doing the opposite is characteristic of people with a negative outlook. They put their energy into worrying about things they have no control over while ignoring those things they do have control over.
This leads to a fixation on problems while ignoring all of the good things one should be thankful for. These people can have 10 positive events and one problem and they will fixate on the problem. They get so stuck that they don’t enjoy the good things that happen.
Here are some tips for adjusting to a positive outlook. Take responsibility for your life. Appreciate all of your blessings. Constantly maintain an attitude of gratitude. Recognize that every problem has a solution. Take action for any situation you can influence. Let go of circumstances outside your control. Make a commitment to always make the best of whatever you encounter.
Adjusting your outlook doesn’t take a lot of effort. Ironically, it requires less energy to remain positive than to be constantly upset. Your world is what you make it. Adjust your outlook so you appreciate all of the good surrounding you.
NOW AVAILABLE: "Dare to Live Without Limits," the book. Visit www.BryanGolden.com or your bookstore. Bryan is a management consultant, motivational speaker, author, and adjunct professor. E-mail Bryan at
or write him c/o this paper. 2012 Bryan Golden