Looking after yourself isn’t necessarily selfish

You want to be OK with your emotions. It's important to understand how you are feeling and why. What makes you happy? What upsets you? By understanding emotional cause and effect, you can take action to maximize positive emotions while working to minimize negative ones.

Don't ignore unpleasant feelings, hoping they will go away. Being OK emotionally requires a conscious strategy of knowing yourself and how things impact you. You are then in a position to actively participate in your emotional well-being.

It's just as important to be OK physically as it is mentally. The health and well-being of your mind and body are inseparable. If you are feeling off mentally, you must not allow your physical state to be neglected.

Exercise is one of the best ways to reduce the negative impact of stress. Just taking a walk is a great way to clear your mind while taking care of your body. Avoid any self-destructive behavior such as substance abuse or over or under eating. Stressing your body also stresses your mind. The last thing you need is to make things worse.

Stress should not and does not need to be a way of life. Chronic stress is destructive both mentally and physically. Dealing with stress starts with identifying the cause and then formulating an effective strategy for lessening it. Hiding from or masking stress only makes things worse.

It's important to be OK financially. There are only two strategies for financial health. Increase your income and/or reduce your expenses. The best approach combines the two; living below your means. There may be occasions where others ask you to loan or give them money. It's OK to make sure your financial needs are met before considering giving to others.

You spend more time working than at virtually any other activity. If you are not OK with your occupation, you need to make changes. There is no need to suffer at work. You can change jobs or change your position with your current employer. If you don't have the skills or education needed, get them. Perhaps your own full or part time business could be an option.

Your priorities are another area where you want to be OK. You must be the one to set them, not someone else. A great source of frustration is attempting to fulfill priorities which are not your own. Your priorities should be based on your needs and objectives. Although other people will constantly attempt to dictate your priorities, you don't have to listen to them or convince them otherwise.

Connected to your priorities are your goals. It's virtually impossible to be OK with goals imposed on you. Everyone has their own desires based on personality, experiences, likes, dislikes, strengths and weaknesses. It's OK for your goals to be in alignment with who you are.

Take a look at the various aspects of your life. Identify any areas where you don't feel things are OK. Figure out the cause of what is wrong and then formulate a plan to make corrections. It is OK to be OK.

NOW AVAILABLE: "Dare to Live Without Limits," the book. Visit www.BryanGolden.com or your bookstore. Bryan is a management consultant, motivational speaker, author, and adjunct professor. E-mail Bryan at bryan@columnist.com or write him c/o this paper.  2014 Bryan Golden