Dare To Live Without Limits

Bryan Golden

Don't excuse yourself into becoming a failure “expert”

It's easy to locate people who can enumerate many reasons why failure is certain. Consult them about any ambitious goal you may have, and you will face a barrage of negative opinions and perhaps even ridicule. These predictors of doom and gloom are failure experts. Here are some more excuses that don't have to apply to you. You can be a success expert.

Things never work for me
Have you ever observed a child trying to prove they can't do something? The child will make a halfhearted attempt that invariably fails. Their reaction will then be, "See, I told you I couldn't do it." Since they tried and failed, the results proved the child's premise.
Adults behave in the same way. Perhaps a person has had a bad experience. They will then purport to predict their destiny: since a failure occurred in the past, nothing will work in the future.
When something doesn't work as planned, it provides lots of knowledge on what to adjust before moving forward. Anyone who is successful has persisted despite numerous experiences with undesirable results.

My timing is never right and I have bad luck
Failure experts are big believers in chance. They feel providence provides successful people with an edge. These experts are convinced they are not destined to succeed. Therefore, there is no point for them to even try. They resign themselves to accepting their lot in life. Their energy is devoted to complaining rather than changing what they don't like.
Although it's always nice to be fortunate, luck occurs when preparation meets opportunity. Lucky people don't wait for opportunity, they create it. Don't wait for your ship to come in, swim out to find it.

I'm not success oriented
There are those who avoid success under the guise that it is evil as well as a bad influence. They will point to so called successful people who are ruthless, underhanded, or take advantage of others. They claim avoiding success allows them to avoid the cause of so much misery.
Success doesn't change people; it simply allows them to advertise who they really are. Truly successful people are kind and considerate and derive their success from being of service to others. A successful person can do more to help others than one who lives far below their potential.

Other people will laugh at me
Fear of ridicule stops failure experts from achieving their goals. They avoid criticism by never sharing their dreams with friends or family. Instead, they suppress any aspirations. They would rather conform to what others consider the norm than risk condemnation. Acceptance is far more important to them than success.
All successful people have been criticized along their journey. Discouragement from those who are closest to you is common. People are jealous if you succeed while they don't. You should share your goals only with people who offer encouragement. Ignore any negative sentiments. Although there is always an abundance of opinions, your life is your responsibility. Don't be deterred by others.

Other people have failed
Examples set by other failures are more relevant to failure experts than success stories. For them, one example of failure is all they need to justify their decision to not even try. Why someone else failed is immaterial. All that matters is that it proves success is not guaranteed.
You want to follow the path of people who succeed. Those who fail demonstrate what mistakes to avoid but are not a deterrent to success. Seek examples that encourage you, not dissuade you.
If you follow the guidance of failure experts, you will experience the same negative results they achieve. There are always reasons why you can succeed. Find them and concentrate on them.

NOW AVAILABLE: "Dare to Live Without Limits," the book. Visit www.BryanGolden.com or your bookstore. Bryan is a management consultant, motivational speaker, author, and adjunct professor. E-mail Bryan at bryan@columnist.com or write him c/o this paper.  2023 Bryan Golden


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